As of this writing, the manhunt continues for Richard Matt and David Sweat, the two escaped murderers in upstate New York and Vermont. Cops on the lookout, distributing flyers all over the place; warnings to campers; constant updates in the local media, a sudden and very real outbreak of fears that Vermonters like to think they’re immune from.
And right on cue, here comes conservative political consultant Darcie Johnston, who hasn’t been on a winning campaign since she left the Jim Jeffords operation more than a decade ago, with the real question that’s on everybody’s mind. Not.
Yeah, really. Those goddamn featherbedding cops, traipsing through the fields and forests at all hours. It’s like a vacation when you think about it. The New York Times:
Those who know the terrain have made jokes that, if the men are in these woods, they are surprised the pair have not turned themselves over to the authorities by now, beaten up by nature and begging for a break. The rain has fallen regularly and hard. The woods are filled with skunks, porcupines and black bears. Then there are the bugs that swarm the forest this time of year: black flies, ticks and deer flies.
Usually, you can count on conservatives to support law enforcement and security as a true core function of government, and express gratitude to those who risk their own safety to preserve ours. But not Darcie, I guess.
I’d like to know her alternative. Call off the search and let the free market sort it out? Contract it to the private sector and hire the lowest bidder?
Hey, I know: send in the drones and bomb ’em out. Might be some collateral damage, but I bet we’d save some precious taxpayer dollars.