So, former U.S. Attorney Christina Nolan has entered the race for U.S. Senate as a Republican. She launched her campaign with the requisite folksy video that touts her record as prosecutor, trumpets her native Vermonter status, and includes the obligatory barn scene.

And positions herself as a moderate who can “work across the aisle” to Get Things Done For Vermonters. As opposed to U.S. Rep. Peter Welch, who she characterizes as “too left.”

Yes, the Peter Welch whose lowest vote total in the last ten years was 64.4%. Yes, the Peter Welch who constantly boasts of his work with the bipartisan Problem Solvers Caucus. And yes, the Vermont that keeps electing Bernie Sanders.

Oh well, she doesn’t stand a chance anyway. The only way Welch will lose is if he dies before Election Day, and he seems awfully healthy to me.

Still, wouldn’t it be ironic if the first woman, and first lesbian, we send to Congress is a Republican? If nothing else, Nolan will put up a better showing than Anya Tynio or Mark Donka or anyone else lurking on the Republican “bench.” Although her campaign logo seems a little… flat?

I give her credit for not using the color green or an outline map of Vermont, but, um… not feelin’ it.

The bio on her campaign website is heavy on her resumé as U.S. Attorney: her role in the EB-5 prosecution, the Purdue Pharma settlement and protecting women from abuse and trafficking. It touts her nomination by both Gov. Phil Scott and Sen. Patrick Leahy, but astonishingly doesn’t name the president who actually put her name forward. Donald… uh… whatsisname.

There’s one big “accomplishment” notable by its absence: Her fervent approach to prosecuting drug offenses. I guess her handlers see that as a losing proposition.

It must also be noted that Nolan has never run for elective office. Molly Gray notwithstanding, that’s a very high bar to clear. Most first-timers who seek a high office betray their lack of experience before Election Day.

She will win the Republican nomination. She will spare the VTGOP the embarrassment of fielding a no-hoper candidate. She will make a respectable showing in debates. She should be credited for her willingness to take on a long-odds campaign. But she won’t win, and she won’t come close. Her entry changes nothing about the outcome of the election, which will be the elevation of Peter Welch.