All Bernie all the time

A good newspaper covers the waterfront. It provides an overview of what’s gone on in the world, the things you need to know, things you might not otherwise know.

Those of us who still read newspapers appreciate the chockablock presentation of stories from the community, nation, and world. It’s a tangible StumbleUpon that gives you more information about the things you’re aware of and brings other items to your attention, making you a better-informed and more well-rounded citizen.

Well, the Burlington Free Press is here to say “Screw that mess.”

Today’s Freeploid, from the top:

Page 1: Bernie Sanders
Page 2: Bernie Sanders
Page 3: Full-page advertisement
Page 4: Bernie Sanders
Page 5: Bernie Sanders
Page 6: Bernie Sanders
Page 7: Bernie Sanders
Page 8: Bernie Sanders
Page 9: Bernie Sanders
Page 10: Bernie Sanders
Page 11: Bernie Sanders

Page 12: Editorial and op-ed about Bernie Sanders.

Finally, on page 13, the first non-Bernie content: a pair of opinion pieces about other subjects.

After that? Sorry, no room. The next ten pages are devoted to Sports, with the variety of content you expect from a good newspaper.

That brings us to the end of Section A. Section B is repurposed “content” from the Freeploid’s big dumb brother, USA TODAY. (Gannett lawyers insist on ALL CAPS.)

Section C — finally! — is entitled “Vermont.” Very nice story about Green Up Day. Column by big-deal novelist Chris Bohjalian.

And that’s it.

All the news that’s fit to print.

Thanks for coming. Don’t forget to tip your waitress. Goodnight, everybody!

See, my problem is I already know everything I need to know about Bernie Sanders. I kinda skipped over the Bernie stories, which left me with a good five minutes’ worth of reading material in my Sunday paper.

There are two primary factors in the decline of print journalism. The first, and larger, is the digital media landscape and all its ripple effects.

The second? Traditional media’s response to the changing landscape. Which violates one of the cardial rules of the marketplace: If you want to sell something, make it attractive and useful to the buyer.

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